This week I’ve turned on, tuned in and erm, chewed the fat with 18000 Java developers. Not literally of course. Really, I’m trying not to get swept away by the mass hysteria of this year’s open source-tastic JavaOne conference, but it is, according to Sun’s very own stonewashed denim CEO Jonathan Schwartz, the largest OS developer conference in da world, and who are we to argue?

My takeaway from this trip will be creepy Alcatraz, trying desperately to find a trolley bus in the early hours, maps which don’t show the freakin inclines on the street – and I thought Sheffield was bad  - and Sun SVP Rich Green’s superb tight jeans, tight black t-shirt combo. Nice try Rich, but Jobs has the trademark already on non-descript sports casual wear, good as your keynote was. Oh and that hot DJ at the opening keynote. Oh and the…never mind.

But before I sound like an unappreciative, sexually frustrated developer, the show has shown me the fanaticism of the open source crowd and Java developers. I heard there are workshops in the Moscone Centre (the aircraft hanger building where JavaOne is held) at around midnight. Midnight? That’s when most sane people are trying to score crack from a toothless crone in The Mission. Sorry, that’s exaggerating. Maybe a bit of weed.